Now Smudger is a fine chap with a Landy Series One
He went to a pub with his sister and a couple of other chums
When drew the evening to a close the soberest of them all
Was the only lady driver in the group, young Mary (not very tall)
“Fear not my lads” she bravely said “I will get you safely back”
She briskly drove the Landy along the country track
Spying a light coloured patch she said “Do you think that’s ice?”
“No it’s only salt” the boys replied “we’ll be home in a trice”
The Landy lost its footing then and bounced right off a tree
It landed in a muddy field with no gate that we could see.
A bumpy lap around the edge revealed no clear escape
So back they went the way they had come to get into this scrape
The moral of this story is plain for all to see
If you want to have a pint or two just don’t rely on me!
But what can you expect, with a woman at the wheel?
They show no respect, for the road they have no feel.
Now Mr.Bull you asked for this
With words so very unjust
How can a man who drives a shed
Have views that we can trust?