brakehorsepower.net

I must tell my readers that none of the above pieces of advice are from me but from an imposter - Aunt Lindy indeed! although I have to admit you do seem to have a talent for this Bob, maybe you missed your vocation.................

Jack, did she help you paint your car

Aerosols

love jack

Jack, it has taken me most of the day to find a dignified response to your last posting and I have failed. Much as it grieves me to concede, the last word has to go to you on this occasion.

Why is all this wiffle being posted in the "On Track" section of the forum?

Chris A, can we have an "Off Track" board please - although I realise that Lord Unstone and Basher Bevan will think it has been created especially for them and their offroad exploits

Cheers

Tim

PS
Bob, I look forward to listening to your interview with Kimi. I'm sure that you will be able to gain thoughtful, well enunciated comments that will catapult 3 Counties Radio into the premier league of Motorsport Journalism.

Tim ....but that would be sensible !!! we dont want that "do we"

love jack

Tim,
I concur on your point about on 'off track' section, which I had intended to suggest to Chris, with due regard to time, money, effort required to set it up.
Having started the 'Silly Section' as a joke the number of posts and their content does underline the amount of general chat, anecdotes, stories, personal vendettas and memories that could find there way into the public domain without clogging up the 'on track' bit.

Point 2. Are you suggesting that BBC Three Counties Radio is not already at the very heart of international motorsport?
I can assure that a host of famous names have had my microphone thrust before them, and without wishing to appear conceited, and purely in attempt to put the matter straight I append a few names I have interviewed for the station;

Michael Schumacher, Rubens Barichello, Jenson Button, David Coulthard, Jarno Trulli, Ralph Schumacher, Anthony Davidson, Aguri Suzuki, Adrian Newey, Luca Montezumelo, Heikki Kovalainen, Andy Priaulx, Max Mosely, Jason Plato, Matt Neal, Tim Harvey, Torvill and Dean, Tamara Ecclestone, Katy Melua, Striling Moss, Jack Brabham, Jackie Stewart, John Surtees, Jody Schecter and last but not least Tim Hill,and many, many more including Miss Dynamite and Bjorn Waldegard.

I am a very humble sort of a chap and it pains me to be dropping names like this, as it could be interpreted as boasting, however the honour of 3CR requires me to break my silence and lay myself open to charges of self glorification, which, of course, was never the intention.

So just watch it in future Mush or I'll bounce ya!

Mary? What does a chap have to do to please you? There I am backing your bid for fame as an agony aunt and I get labelled an impostor.

I suggest you reach in side yourself to find the gentle femine side of your nature, cast aside all self doubt, tell your loved ones how much you care for them, and eat an orange everyday.

Uncle Bob.

PS I will be at the Grand Prix over next weekend mingling with all of the other top Formula 1 journos and pundits and broadcasting live to the Great
British public live. Do tune in.

[quote="Bob Bull"] dropping names like this, as it could be interpreted as boasting , however the honour of 3CR requires me to break my silence and lay myself open to charges of self glorification,

bob
one should never name drop, it is certainly self agrandisement, belittles the audience, infers acquaintance, often implying faint hopes for respect, -- exactly the reasons not to do so---(by the way Prince Phillip told me that)

Mary? What does a chap have to do to please you?

Bob, I have been asked that question many times. If it's on the track the best thing is to keep out of my way! If it's in the paddock the buy me a beer at the bar.

There I am backing your bid for fame as an agony aunt and I get labelled an impostor.

I appreciate your backing but then you go and do the job yourself (and probably for more pay). Maybe you are more suited to this agony stuff than I am with your high-flying, name-dropping media expertise!

I suggest you reach in side yourself to find the gentle femine side of your nature, cast aside all self doubt, tell your loved ones how much you care for them, and eat an orange everyday.

Dear Uncle Bob, I have eaten the orange and I don't seem to be any closer to my feminine side, what should I do?
Worried from Inworth

"basher Bevan"????
I think the "tyre smoker" sounds more dignified.

Mary,
I notice you (fairly) graciously yielded the last word to Jack B in a previous post, and I feel that I can do no less with you.


Especially as I think it wise never to bandy words with a binge drinking woman driver.

Lots of love,

Uncle Bob.

PS; It is possible you don't have a femine side, maybe it got lost along the way?

Peter,
Thank you for your advice, I will never name drop again.

What a coincidence you mention old Phil, I missed him off ......... Sorry!

Would it be alright to mention I have met Chris Acklam?

Bob S.O.F.

Dear Uncle Bob, do you think I might find my feminine side if I ate another orange or maybe a grapefruit? Does it matter if I can't?

Mary this might help..
Definition ...Feminine..requirements must be able to..
Cook
Wash up
Iron
Make the beds
Make the men in your life happy
Dont NAG
Let Men beat you at racing
and look good in a tight Outfit (always works for me at least)

love jack

Mr. Bellinger, Jack,
I had been considering turning to you for advice on how to please the Lady in question,as you appear to have some previous experience, - well perhaps that is not the right phrase, shall we say knowledge of, er ..... well ... maybe .... had encountered before?
All my efforts to date have failed. You see as I don't race I can hardly give her room on the track. Being a non-drinker I am unlikely to meet her in a bar and my support for her attempt to become a columnist rejected out of hand.

I would have taken her picture at Silverstone, but she expired at Becketts and I was poised at Abbey!

I wondered about flowers or chocolates. Do you think an ounce of rough shag or a plug of chawin' terbaccy might be better?

By the way is there a Mr Mary or a significant other? Some steroid enhanced, iron pumping colossus, I should be aware of?

Be assured my interest is purely platonic and I do not want to intrude on any arrangements already in place.

I would appreciate any help you can offer. Maybe in how to spell feminin ...!

Very best wishes,


Bob.

I suppose you have heard the one about, Why do brides wear white? To match the rest of the kitchen furniture.